Is Your Fear Real, Perceived or Irrational? And What Is It Trying to Teach You?



Do you remember the expression of “making a mountain out of a molehill”?  It’s the same with the things we fear in life.  For the great majority of fears, they are simply things we have a perception of and simply have increased it to unfathomable levels.  Sure, there are real fears and those are the ones that keep us truly safe from real dangers.  I had to have that both in the Marines and in the LAPD.  Being in harm’s way was simply part of my job.

The thing is, most people have fears that are not real.  Take the fear of public speaking. That fear is one that is perceived.  I wouldn’t call it an irrational fear.  Phobias, such as the fear of clowns and flying are irrational in nature.  That’s a whole different ballgame altogether.


When we have fears that are perceived, we can make changes to how we perceive them and simply squish it into nothingness.

Before we go there, there is a legitimate question regarding fears. What are they trying to teach you?  Yes, there are lessons amongst each fear.  If it’s a fear of a real danger, then you better keep your awareness up.  That way you can respond to whatever that danger is.  If it’s one the is perceived, then what challenges are you facing?  For those kinds of fears, you’ll have to dig deeper as to why you have it.  Mostly, if you’re engaging in something you’ve never done before, then what are you there to learn?  Your fear could simply be telling you that may be on the right track or you may have to make adjustments.

Find the lesson and learn from it.

For phobias, get help to squash them.  You can use various  therapies, including Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy (REBT), hypnosis, NLP, EEG Neurofeedback and so forth… Eventually you’ll overcome those types of fears.  The lesson within phobias could be that you’re stronger than you give yourself credit for.  You simply have to find that strength.


For each perceived fear, write them down into a journal.  Write down the lessons.  And discover the learnings.  Once you do that, then use techniques from the above mentioned therapies to help you dissolve them.  Heck, if you simply take action in facing your fear, then it may just simply disappear on its own.  And that thing that you once feared may be the thing that you’re most passionate about.  Just like going on a roller coaster for the first time and then wanting to do it over and over again.


Bob Choat, “Transformational Master Black Belt” Black_belt.svg-sm
America’s #1 Mind-Body Transformation Expert and author of Mind Your Own Fitness

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One Comment on “Is Your Fear Real, Perceived or Irrational? And What Is It Trying to Teach You?”

  1. Kim Says:

    Nice post. Fear is so paralyzing. And you are right, facing that fear, such as the roller coaster, might turn out to be the most fun ever. It seems I must learn this lesson daily.



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